Fans Mourn Stanley Kubrick’s Death by Forcing Themselves to Sit Through 3 Hours of “Barry Lyndon”

February 7, 2011

MIAMI, Florida —According to movie theatre employees, Kubrick fans trudged in en masse this afternoon for the free screening of Barry Lyndon offered by the local alt-cinema. The film, which is reportedly “ridiculously long” and “pretty boring” is based on the 1844 novel The Luck of Barry Lyndon by William Makepeace Thackeray and is considered one of Kubrick’s finest films by cinema luminaries like Martin Scorsese. “You know how people are supposed to be penitent on Good Friday and meditate on the pain of Christ being nailed to the cross? It’s kind of like that,” movie-goer Beatrice Knoepp said. “Some people say they enjoy it, but I think they are just saying that to impress their dates.” At press time, 10 people in attendance at the theatre had fallen asleep and 3 people had tried to skim through the book on their e-readers in an attempt to finish the story before the film had ended.

Written by Kelli


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